finals and life in general

So finals are finally over I passed all but one my lifeguarding one stupid brick anyway now I'm just working on moving out of my dorms I never realized I had so much stuff its going to take me forever to do I feel really dizzy today like I can barely stand up its bad

two weeks

Well I'm in a slightly better mood than I was in my last post so I have two more weeks then I'm headed up north for the summer possibly longer we will see I'm supposed to be packing right now but I'm putting it off until the very last minute just like my mom does loland on that note I had an interesting Sunday night dinner my mok and I got in another fight suprise suprise does it even matter what its about its always one thing or another if any of you have seen Gilmore girls you know those weekly dinners she goes to to see her mother those are exactly what my dinners are like just not as fancy feel free to sympathasize lol I suppose I should get back to packing

to all my friends that i supposedly had

So I was thinking about it and I'm so glad that I'm leaving st George their are just so many people who will pretend to be your friend then stab you in the back its amazing how fake this town is I can count on one hand and not even using all of my fingers how many true friends I have had as I say here thinking about my time in st George and only a couple people came into my mind as to who I would miss any yet I thought of dozens of people that I would finally be away from no wonder I honestly hated high school all the people I thought were my friends are just a bunch of idiots I'm done trying to break into your groups and be your friend I can't wait to leave here and I was thinking about coming back but honestly I would rather shoot myself I don't think anyone will read this as I don't have any followers so what does it matter ... Well it made me feel better anyway I'm sure I'm just in a dark mood I'm sorry if this offends anyone that was not specifically my intention

the week sucked so this is me complaining about it

so all in all this week has completly sucked i didnt get into the college i wanted to not that it would matter anyway because my parents refuse to sign the fafsa so that i could have gotten a student loan i finally told my parents that im not moving back into the house for the summer but am going to be a nanny up north i thought things were finally getting better with them we had decided that i would come for sunday dinner and spend time with the family which i thought would work out perfectly well my first sunday home my mother barely spoke to me she was looking at old pictures of me and was sad about how i had turned out i thought she had finally accepted me and that things would get better i guess not i spent most of that sunday doing my laundry and talking to my dad which was nice cos i got to spend a little more time with him which is rare so this sunday i didnt go over to my house cos my family had gone up to general confrence before this my mother had apologized to me about ignoring me on sunday and had asked me to go to lunch so we could start building a relationship again...it made me feel a whole lot better i was excited to go to lunch and get to know my mom again so my mother hadnt talked to me since two days before they left for general confrence and still hasnt talked to me until i got a message from her on facebook saying we couldnt do dinner this sunday cos its easter. i didnt even know i wasnt going to be invited for easter apparently being part of the family doesnt mean i get to come home for holidays i was really excited to come home and watch my little brothers and sisters hunt for easter eggs i was going to suprise my little sister with tickets to the new hannah montana movie cos i know she really wants to go yes my life sucks i cant wait to go up north and get away from everything